Well, we decided to add another full time vocalist to the None The Wiser fold. After three years of gigging through the harshness of Winter while simultaneously performing my assigned duties as the esteemed director of a high school instrumental music program, it occurred to me that no, I am never going to get through January, February, and March (known collectively in my phrasebook as “the bastard months”) without coming into direct contact with every form of upper respiratory infection known to medicine. The joy of attempting to sing Toto and Queen while under the influence of a cocktail of prescription antibiotics and over-the-counter medicines is one that I can only liken to walking off the end of a diving board while blindfolded, not knowing how high up the board was to begin with, nor knowing how far down or how deep the water will be when you finally hit it. So the solution finally hit me: GET SOMEONE ELSE TO DO IT FOR YOU. As the Germans say….”Ve grow too soon olt und too late schmart”.
The new guy is doing great. He’s not a teacher, so he should be able to stay healthy through the bastard months. Plus, with me harmonizing with he and Trish, it really fattens up the sound. Plus, I don’t have to learn all the lyrics anymore. Plus, I still sing a few leads. Plus, I don’t have to learn all the lyrics anymore. Plus I get to hang out away from “front and center” stage and just mess with my keyboards and guitar. Plus I will now get to add some sax and trumpet to the band. Plus, I don’t have to learn all the lyrics anymore. There are so many upsides to having someone take over the lead singer duties. Oh, and also, I won’t have to learn all the lyrics anymore.
I drive half an hour to school every day, and for the sake of those of you whose abilities to make rational deductions runs a distant second to your excellent taste in selecting which blogs you should read, that means I drive a half an hour home FROM school every day as well. When I have to learn lyrics, that means listening to the song whose lyrics I have to learn over and over. And over. And over. Ad nauseum. Half an hour up to school…..half an hour home from school. Next day. Half and hour up to school….half and hour home from school. Lather. Rinse. Repeat. Half an hour up…..well you get the idea. The same song. Until I can sing the whole thing, start to finish, without tripping on a lyric, without hesitating. Over. And. Over. Again.
Aside of not having to learn the lyrics, hiring a new lead singer also means that I won’t have to do this routine any longer. I can actually listen to music that I enjoy for a change, instead of listening to only what I have to learn for the band. I don’t actually remember what music that is, but I’m hoping that after a few months of decompressing from my previous routine, finding music that I like will start to become a natural part of my life again.
None the Wiser only had one gig this month. It was a bull roast to benefit a local rec baseball team. Lots of fun. The hotel we played at had this manager who told us that there wasn’t enough outlets available to plug in our stage lighting. So we were up on stage getting ready to play and we thought, “well, this isn’t too bad”. Then they shut the lights off in the ball room. Then we were in the dark, except for what minimal lighting was left because of table candles and wall sconces. No one in the audience could really see us.
I didn’t mind because the stage had a back wall that had all these mirrors on them. I could turn around and look at them and see myself playing, and it was really cool. It reminded me of when I was a kid and used to pose with my guitar in my parents mirror and pretend I was really something special! Only in this case, it was REAL! I was on stage with a real live band, in front of a real live audience, posing with my guitar in the mirror and pretending I was something really special. And because it was dark, I could do this without anyone noticing how narcissistic I am!
I should add that I use the term “live audience” quite loosely, because the only way we actually knew they were alive is because we could see the plates of food and glasses of booze on their tables when we took a break. When we were on stage however, we couldn’t tell because they never clapped. Never. Not once. Not once in the whole night. We’d get to the end of the song…
”brrrddddddddddddddddd-d-d-d-d-d-d----d-----d------baddaddaDUM!!!!”
…and all you would hear was crickets. No clapping. Not a sound. If it weren’t for being able to watch myself in the mirror pretending to be something special, it would have made for a long, miserable evening.
At school we had the Harford County Band Festival. The kids played great. They looked great, they played great, they had a great time eating lunch at Burger King after the gig. My tuba player forgot his black socks and when he sat up holding his tuba, you could see his legs between his black shoes and his black pants. He had to barter with another band member whose bare legs wouldn’t look so obvious on stage to let him use their socks. Two kids forgot their tuxedo shirts and had to call their parents. One kid forgot her bowtie and cumberbund. We got to eat lunch at Burger King.
Then we had a jazz coffeehouse on the 27th. Played to a full house. My 1st trombone player told me less than 48 hours before the gig that he couldn’t make it because he was going to a wedding. I always appreciate an advanced notice. I got to sight read the 1st trombone book at the gig. I didn’t do too bad, and the band got a nice standing ovation. Really great gig. I always appreciate an advanced notice. The band boosters put on a nice spread of desserts and drinks. Nice community and family event. We’re going to do another one in May. I always appreciate an advanced notice.
Well, that about wraps it up. The beat rolls on, and I just keep on trying to stay in step, which is not easy when they keep changing the tempo without telling me. I always appreciate an advanced notice. So, until next month….keep on keepin’ on!
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
AIG and the Partisan Illusion
The stuff that has been going on with AIG is unbelievable.
What I’m referring to is NOT the fact that AIG took billions of dollars in government bailout funds and then had the audacity to give 165 million dollars to its corporate executives as bonuses. I’m also not referring to the now seemingly endless parade of politicians who are lining up to bash AIG for this action.
What I’m referring to is that anyone is actually shocked or surprised by this.
I can’t believe that anyone at this point would be surprised to learn the depth of greed that runs in the corporate mentality. These are the people that bled the American economy right into the mess that it is already in and then came back for more.
And I can’t believe that anyone would actually fall for this tiresome act staged by our elected officials. The government sponsored AIG with money that belonged to the American people. I’ll venture a wild guess and say that no one in congress ran out and loaded their portfolios up with AIG stock the day after the bailout. These people now have the audacity to claim that they didn’t know AIG would do this with taxpayer funds. True enough; maybe they didn’t. That’s not the point. The point is that they also didn’t CARE enough to make sure it didn’t or couldn’t happen.
The nonsense that these bills are so big that there is no way that they can know every last line of detail that is involved in them is just that. Nonsense. First, it is their job to know. Second, they sure didn’t think it was too big a job to make sure their earmarks made it into the final draft. Third, the government sure doesn’t think it is too big a job to check all the millions of pieces paperwork involved each year when it comes time for Joe Average to file his taxes. It’s too big a job for the government to make sure some corporation that already drove itself into the ground with greed doesn’t take 165 million of our dollars and snarf that up too. But it’s not too big a job for them to make sure you have the receipt from that $75 donation you made to “Save the Squirrels” last year.
Remember when President Bush wanted to go to war with Iraq? Remember when congress voted to let him? Remember when all the Dems then claimed that they were duped? Well, it was their job not to be duped. Same goes here, only the other way around.
But now of course, the next step is going to be the usual partisan finger pointing with all the adherents to the respective sides lining up to take part. Lefties will point at the right, and righties will point at the left.
When are American’s going to learn that their dollars are not partisan? The war in Iraq cost billions of dollars. They didn’t cost Republican dollars. They didn’t cost Democrat dollars. They cost YOUR dollars regardless of what party you belong to. Likewise, the money that AIG execs got came out of your pockets regardless of which lever you pulled last November, and they got it courtesy of all the people (who by the way, are also getting paid a pretty hefty sum) you thought were looking out for your best interest.
Partisanship is a wonderful illusion perpetuated by our politicians. It is the illusion that keeps the taxpayers from seeing that all politicians work for the same organization. And they have an incentive to keep the illusion going.
What is really unbelievable is that more people have not figured out the trick yet.
A few more thoughts:
The same government that gave AIG your money so they could pass it on to their already wealthy execs is the same government that wants to manage your health care system.
Both Obama and McCain received campaign contributions from AIG. I’ve been hard pressed to come up with exact figures (I’ve read anything from 50 to 100k), but I don’t think it matters. Neither Obama nor McCain have been heard expressing outrage that this company would donate to their election campaigns and then look for a taxpayer bailout.
When you got a guaranteed student loan or a home mortgage loan, did the government just hand you the money and let you do anything with it, or did they give the proceeds DIRECTLY to the company who was owed money? Why didn’t they do the same thing with the companies they bailed out?
What I’m referring to is NOT the fact that AIG took billions of dollars in government bailout funds and then had the audacity to give 165 million dollars to its corporate executives as bonuses. I’m also not referring to the now seemingly endless parade of politicians who are lining up to bash AIG for this action.
What I’m referring to is that anyone is actually shocked or surprised by this.
I can’t believe that anyone at this point would be surprised to learn the depth of greed that runs in the corporate mentality. These are the people that bled the American economy right into the mess that it is already in and then came back for more.
And I can’t believe that anyone would actually fall for this tiresome act staged by our elected officials. The government sponsored AIG with money that belonged to the American people. I’ll venture a wild guess and say that no one in congress ran out and loaded their portfolios up with AIG stock the day after the bailout. These people now have the audacity to claim that they didn’t know AIG would do this with taxpayer funds. True enough; maybe they didn’t. That’s not the point. The point is that they also didn’t CARE enough to make sure it didn’t or couldn’t happen.
The nonsense that these bills are so big that there is no way that they can know every last line of detail that is involved in them is just that. Nonsense. First, it is their job to know. Second, they sure didn’t think it was too big a job to make sure their earmarks made it into the final draft. Third, the government sure doesn’t think it is too big a job to check all the millions of pieces paperwork involved each year when it comes time for Joe Average to file his taxes. It’s too big a job for the government to make sure some corporation that already drove itself into the ground with greed doesn’t take 165 million of our dollars and snarf that up too. But it’s not too big a job for them to make sure you have the receipt from that $75 donation you made to “Save the Squirrels” last year.
Remember when President Bush wanted to go to war with Iraq? Remember when congress voted to let him? Remember when all the Dems then claimed that they were duped? Well, it was their job not to be duped. Same goes here, only the other way around.
But now of course, the next step is going to be the usual partisan finger pointing with all the adherents to the respective sides lining up to take part. Lefties will point at the right, and righties will point at the left.
When are American’s going to learn that their dollars are not partisan? The war in Iraq cost billions of dollars. They didn’t cost Republican dollars. They didn’t cost Democrat dollars. They cost YOUR dollars regardless of what party you belong to. Likewise, the money that AIG execs got came out of your pockets regardless of which lever you pulled last November, and they got it courtesy of all the people (who by the way, are also getting paid a pretty hefty sum) you thought were looking out for your best interest.
Partisanship is a wonderful illusion perpetuated by our politicians. It is the illusion that keeps the taxpayers from seeing that all politicians work for the same organization. And they have an incentive to keep the illusion going.
What is really unbelievable is that more people have not figured out the trick yet.
A few more thoughts:
The same government that gave AIG your money so they could pass it on to their already wealthy execs is the same government that wants to manage your health care system.
Both Obama and McCain received campaign contributions from AIG. I’ve been hard pressed to come up with exact figures (I’ve read anything from 50 to 100k), but I don’t think it matters. Neither Obama nor McCain have been heard expressing outrage that this company would donate to their election campaigns and then look for a taxpayer bailout.
When you got a guaranteed student loan or a home mortgage loan, did the government just hand you the money and let you do anything with it, or did they give the proceeds DIRECTLY to the company who was owed money? Why didn’t they do the same thing with the companies they bailed out?
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Why It Will Never Change
I was fortunate enough to be among the few fortunate teachers in our school system to teach an experimental course to freshman called “Living In the Contemporary World”.
Among the myriad of interesting current events we discussed was energy. We discussed the whole range of energy related topics: fossil fuels, alternative energy, conservation, pollution, costs, global warming, and the environment. I’m not sure what the students learned from our discussions, but here is what I learned from them:
They believe that global warming is happening and it is happening because of the burning of fossil fuels. They believe that through the development of alternative energy sources and through conservation that we can slow and eventually regulate the changing climate. They believe that we can preserve our environment by curbing the use of fossil fuel, cut down on pollution, and generally be a happier, healthier, greener society. And, they believe that we can all make a difference.
I thought this was wonderful. “How wonderful,” I thought. “What wonderful children they are to be so concerned with the world around them, and be so interested in the preservation of our world for future generations.” Isn’t this wonderful? I mean, how could you not think this is wonderful? It really is wonderful, when you think about it.
Then I told them that it would never change.
Of course, they were appalled. How could I say that? Of course it’s going to change! Their generation is going to take control! Their generation is environmentally conscious and dedicated to fighting the cause of global warming!
Then I told them that I had a really wonderful idea on how THEY could help make their wonderful visions become a wonderful reality. And it would be a very simple act that would take absolutely NO effort on their part:
Don’t drive to school.
Yep. You heard me. Don’t drive to school. Lots of them will be turning sixteen years old in the not too distant future, and all they have to do to get the ball rolling is agree to not drive to school when they are so permitted by law.
“Think about it,” I told them. “If you all drive 5 miles per day to get to and from school, and you do this for 180 days per year, and there are 25 of you in this class, that would be 18,750 miles of driving per year. If your cars average around 25 miles per gallon, that would be 750 gallons of gas. So if you all would just take the school bus, which is already provided whether you use it or not, think of what a big step that would be!”
“And,” I continued, “if you could convince the other 500 or so 16, 17, and 18 year olds in the school to do the same, that would save around 18,000 gallons of gas per year, just at this high school alone! AND…if we could get the OTHER 16, 17, and 18 year olds at the other 9 high schools in the county to not drive to school, that would save 180,000 gallons per year, just in our county alone!”
“Now then: how many of you are going to sign an agreement that you will never drive to school, in order to conserve energy, help stop pollution, preserve the environment, and curb climate change?”
Not one hand went up.
“Come on!” I said. “Don’t you want to go green? Don’t you want to be part of securing your own future? All you have to do is not drive where you are already being provided public transportation! Come on! Why don’t you want to make it happen?”
Still no hands.
Why no volunteers?
As it turns out, you see, riding the school bus would be inconvenient. Plus, it’s uncomfortable. And they might have to sit next to someone they didn’t like. Some of them live on a big hill, and they would have to walk up and down the hill to the bus stop which could be dangerous in the winter if it was icy (as opposed to driving a car up and down an icy hill?). And, what if they have to work after school? Riding the bus home would mean they wouldn’t be able to start work until a half an hour later, and their boss might not like that. Plus, they’ve waited all their lives to drive, so why shouldn’t they?
“And that, my dear children, is why it will never change.”
Among the myriad of interesting current events we discussed was energy. We discussed the whole range of energy related topics: fossil fuels, alternative energy, conservation, pollution, costs, global warming, and the environment. I’m not sure what the students learned from our discussions, but here is what I learned from them:
They believe that global warming is happening and it is happening because of the burning of fossil fuels. They believe that through the development of alternative energy sources and through conservation that we can slow and eventually regulate the changing climate. They believe that we can preserve our environment by curbing the use of fossil fuel, cut down on pollution, and generally be a happier, healthier, greener society. And, they believe that we can all make a difference.
I thought this was wonderful. “How wonderful,” I thought. “What wonderful children they are to be so concerned with the world around them, and be so interested in the preservation of our world for future generations.” Isn’t this wonderful? I mean, how could you not think this is wonderful? It really is wonderful, when you think about it.
Then I told them that it would never change.
Of course, they were appalled. How could I say that? Of course it’s going to change! Their generation is going to take control! Their generation is environmentally conscious and dedicated to fighting the cause of global warming!
Then I told them that I had a really wonderful idea on how THEY could help make their wonderful visions become a wonderful reality. And it would be a very simple act that would take absolutely NO effort on their part:
Don’t drive to school.
Yep. You heard me. Don’t drive to school. Lots of them will be turning sixteen years old in the not too distant future, and all they have to do to get the ball rolling is agree to not drive to school when they are so permitted by law.
“Think about it,” I told them. “If you all drive 5 miles per day to get to and from school, and you do this for 180 days per year, and there are 25 of you in this class, that would be 18,750 miles of driving per year. If your cars average around 25 miles per gallon, that would be 750 gallons of gas. So if you all would just take the school bus, which is already provided whether you use it or not, think of what a big step that would be!”
“And,” I continued, “if you could convince the other 500 or so 16, 17, and 18 year olds in the school to do the same, that would save around 18,000 gallons of gas per year, just at this high school alone! AND…if we could get the OTHER 16, 17, and 18 year olds at the other 9 high schools in the county to not drive to school, that would save 180,000 gallons per year, just in our county alone!”
“Now then: how many of you are going to sign an agreement that you will never drive to school, in order to conserve energy, help stop pollution, preserve the environment, and curb climate change?”
Not one hand went up.
“Come on!” I said. “Don’t you want to go green? Don’t you want to be part of securing your own future? All you have to do is not drive where you are already being provided public transportation! Come on! Why don’t you want to make it happen?”
Still no hands.
Why no volunteers?
As it turns out, you see, riding the school bus would be inconvenient. Plus, it’s uncomfortable. And they might have to sit next to someone they didn’t like. Some of them live on a big hill, and they would have to walk up and down the hill to the bus stop which could be dangerous in the winter if it was icy (as opposed to driving a car up and down an icy hill?). And, what if they have to work after school? Riding the bus home would mean they wouldn’t be able to start work until a half an hour later, and their boss might not like that. Plus, they’ve waited all their lives to drive, so why shouldn’t they?
“And that, my dear children, is why it will never change.”
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Fair Trade Coffee in Biodegradable Cups
I just flew in from San Diego...and boy, are my arms tired! (ba-dum-chhhh...)
Anyway, there I was in the San Diego Zoo, and there I was waiting in line for a nice cold beverage, and there I was noticing a nice sign on the snack bar wall, and here is a nice picture of the nice sign:
Isn't that wonderful!!! Yes, I know that is a question and I know that I used exclamation points instead of question marks. But that is because I meant it not as a question, but as an exclamation. Got it? (please don't forget this point...you will need to refer back to it later...)
It was also wonderful that the snack bar had nice tables for people to sit at while they enjoyed a nice hot Fair Trade Coffee in Biodegradable Cups.
While I was sitting there however, I noticed something: no one was drinking any of the Fair Trade Coffee in Biodegradable Cups. Of course! It was two o'clock in the afternoon on a sunny day in southern California! So it would only make sense that people would not make coffee their beverage of choice, even if it was Fair Trade Coffee in Biodegradable Cups. Instead, most people elected the cold beverages, which made for scenes such as this one:
Notice that there are no biodegradable cups in this scene. The cold beverages were served in nice, big, juicy, 100% plastic cups made in the good ol' USA, brought in all the way from West Virginia by tractor trailers burning only the finest refined fossil fuel.
But wait! That's not all! If you happened to have a hankerin' for something neat to eat, you could get that here as well! Yes, that's right! Served in a giant matching plastic bucket! Of course, all these plastics are recyclable, but guess what! (there it is again! Did you remember?)
There were no recycling bins any where near this area! Fortunately, there were plenty of garbage cans strategically placed at the exit areas of the snack bar for your disposing pleasure!
Well, don't feel too bad. We can all take comfort in the fact that if anyone did actually buy Fair Trade Coffee in Biodegradable Cups that it came from a place where the natives won't be growing restless because they are getting screwed out of a fair wage for their labor. And, the cup that comes with the coffee will degrade naturally once the garbage truck, burning only the finest refined fossil fuel, dumps it in the landfill.
Anyway, there I was in the San Diego Zoo, and there I was waiting in line for a nice cold beverage, and there I was noticing a nice sign on the snack bar wall, and here is a nice picture of the nice sign:
Isn't that wonderful!!! Yes, I know that is a question and I know that I used exclamation points instead of question marks. But that is because I meant it not as a question, but as an exclamation. Got it? (please don't forget this point...you will need to refer back to it later...)
It was also wonderful that the snack bar had nice tables for people to sit at while they enjoyed a nice hot Fair Trade Coffee in Biodegradable Cups.
While I was sitting there however, I noticed something: no one was drinking any of the Fair Trade Coffee in Biodegradable Cups. Of course! It was two o'clock in the afternoon on a sunny day in southern California! So it would only make sense that people would not make coffee their beverage of choice, even if it was Fair Trade Coffee in Biodegradable Cups. Instead, most people elected the cold beverages, which made for scenes such as this one:
Notice that there are no biodegradable cups in this scene. The cold beverages were served in nice, big, juicy, 100% plastic cups made in the good ol' USA, brought in all the way from West Virginia by tractor trailers burning only the finest refined fossil fuel.
But wait! That's not all! If you happened to have a hankerin' for something neat to eat, you could get that here as well! Yes, that's right! Served in a giant matching plastic bucket! Of course, all these plastics are recyclable, but guess what! (there it is again! Did you remember?)
There were no recycling bins any where near this area! Fortunately, there were plenty of garbage cans strategically placed at the exit areas of the snack bar for your disposing pleasure!
Well, don't feel too bad. We can all take comfort in the fact that if anyone did actually buy Fair Trade Coffee in Biodegradable Cups that it came from a place where the natives won't be growing restless because they are getting screwed out of a fair wage for their labor. And, the cup that comes with the coffee will degrade naturally once the garbage truck, burning only the finest refined fossil fuel, dumps it in the landfill.
News About News That Is About Nothing
So the Batman movie is taking the world by storm. Speculation has it that part of the reason it has been so successful at the box office is because the Joker bit the dust. Or at least the actor who portrayed him did. Heath Ledger. Or I should say the late or ex-Heath Ledger.
As if the sudden death of a young movie star by a drug overdose isn't enough news, someone in the media had to come up with the idea that the dark nature of his role as the Joker strongly contributed to his demise. Perhaps it was his inability to get out of his character when the camera stopped rolling that promoted his despondence and use of drugs.
OK. Fine. If this was true, then maybe it would be an interesting sidebar. Although it would make me a bit nervous about actors in general. What if the next "Godfather" can't get "out of character" and starts having media people whacked whenever he thinks that they have "disrespected" him, like maybe by accusing him of not being able to get out of character? Could be a problem. On the other hand, it could be a blessing...
At any rate, it doesn't really matter because this whole idea of this actor turning to drugs because his role as the Joker was just way too much for his psyche to handle was made up. It wasn't true. This isn't what happened. Big surprise there, huh?
I know all of this because my wife was watching this show where they were interviewing other actors in the movie about the former Mr. Ledger. They all stated that the idea that his demise was caused by the Joker himself was not true, not possible, crazy, unfounded, etc, etc.
So basically here it is: a show interviewing people about something that was made up asking them if it was true and all of them saying it was made up. The media created the rumor and then had a tv show to dispel the rumor that they made up. Everyone on the show knew the media made it up, but they came on the media's show to tell the world that the media generated rumor was made up.
And I thought that "Seinfeld" was the show that was supposed to be about "nothing".
Seinfeld has nothing on the news.
As if the sudden death of a young movie star by a drug overdose isn't enough news, someone in the media had to come up with the idea that the dark nature of his role as the Joker strongly contributed to his demise. Perhaps it was his inability to get out of his character when the camera stopped rolling that promoted his despondence and use of drugs.
OK. Fine. If this was true, then maybe it would be an interesting sidebar. Although it would make me a bit nervous about actors in general. What if the next "Godfather" can't get "out of character" and starts having media people whacked whenever he thinks that they have "disrespected" him, like maybe by accusing him of not being able to get out of character? Could be a problem. On the other hand, it could be a blessing...
At any rate, it doesn't really matter because this whole idea of this actor turning to drugs because his role as the Joker was just way too much for his psyche to handle was made up. It wasn't true. This isn't what happened. Big surprise there, huh?
I know all of this because my wife was watching this show where they were interviewing other actors in the movie about the former Mr. Ledger. They all stated that the idea that his demise was caused by the Joker himself was not true, not possible, crazy, unfounded, etc, etc.
So basically here it is: a show interviewing people about something that was made up asking them if it was true and all of them saying it was made up. The media created the rumor and then had a tv show to dispel the rumor that they made up. Everyone on the show knew the media made it up, but they came on the media's show to tell the world that the media generated rumor was made up.
And I thought that "Seinfeld" was the show that was supposed to be about "nothing".
Seinfeld has nothing on the news.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Forget Supply and Demand…It’s Bush’s Fault!
Yep, you heard me right. It’s all his fault.
I’m talking about gas prices. If you hadn’t noticed, they are sky high. And all the fault can be directed to one man: George W. Bush.
After all, he’s an “oil man”, right? He’s going to make a bundle off our misery. He can’t wait to see gas hit four bucks a gallon for regular.
Forget supply and demand. This has nothing to do with it, like it does with any other (or for that matter, EVERY other) product. Gas is different. Forget that China and India are in the midst of their own personal industrial revolutions, and consequently have developed a huge need for the stuff, driving demand up. Forget that we have not built an oil refinery in the U.S since 1976, driving supply down. Forget that there are about 70 million more drivers on the road today than in 1976, driving demand up. Forget that in the day of “buck ‘n a half a gallon” gas, cars went from mid-size to full size to bigger than full size, to even bigger than bigger than full size, to Hummer, driving demand up.
None of these things matter when we’re talking about gasoline.
The only thing that matters is Bush.
See, when people want to buy a loaf of bread, they can get it pretty cheap because there is plenty of corn available to make the bread. So, the baker can buy cheap corn, make lots of loaves, and sell them pretty cheap and still make a profit. And corn stays cheap as long as the only thing there is to do with it is make bread, and the only people who want to buy it are bakers.
But when people want to use corn for something else, like say, biofuel, and the biofuel man comes along and he wants all the corn, then he offers the farmer more money for it. Then when the baker needs corn for the bread, he’s got to pay at least as much as the biofuel guy. As the demand goes up, so does the cost. And the baker has to turn around and raise the price of his bread which means you and I have to pay more every time we have a hankerin’ for a PB & J sandwich.
For some reason, though, gas doesn’t work this way. I buy an SUV with double the gas tank size and half the mileage as my old car and the cost of the gas should stay the same, but it doesn’t; it goes up. Why? Because of Bush. A coupla million Chinese people decide they don’t want to bike to work anymore, go out and buy a car, and say “fill’er up!”once a week, and the cost of gas should stay the same, but it doesn’t; it goes up. Why? Because of Bush. People who love trees and flowers and owls don’t want to have to look at those things with an oil refinery in the background don’t let an oil refinery be built for a generation, and the cost of gas should stay the same, but it doesn’t; it goes up. Why? Because of Bush. See? That’s how gas is. It’s not like corn or a loaf of bread. The price of corn goes up with greater demand. Gas doesn’t. The price of gas only goes up because of Bush.
And with corn there is…….heyyyyyy……...wait a second!…….Wait just a gall-dang minute here! Corn is sold by the bushel. The BUSHel!!!
That dirty creep! Enough is enough! NOW I see why my grocery bill has been going up! It’s one thing if he wants me to pay him four bucks a gallon for gas, but I’ll be DAMNED if I’m going to pay him one red cent more for my PB&J sandwich!!!
I’m talking about gas prices. If you hadn’t noticed, they are sky high. And all the fault can be directed to one man: George W. Bush.
After all, he’s an “oil man”, right? He’s going to make a bundle off our misery. He can’t wait to see gas hit four bucks a gallon for regular.
Forget supply and demand. This has nothing to do with it, like it does with any other (or for that matter, EVERY other) product. Gas is different. Forget that China and India are in the midst of their own personal industrial revolutions, and consequently have developed a huge need for the stuff, driving demand up. Forget that we have not built an oil refinery in the U.S since 1976, driving supply down. Forget that there are about 70 million more drivers on the road today than in 1976, driving demand up. Forget that in the day of “buck ‘n a half a gallon” gas, cars went from mid-size to full size to bigger than full size, to even bigger than bigger than full size, to Hummer, driving demand up.
None of these things matter when we’re talking about gasoline.
The only thing that matters is Bush.
See, when people want to buy a loaf of bread, they can get it pretty cheap because there is plenty of corn available to make the bread. So, the baker can buy cheap corn, make lots of loaves, and sell them pretty cheap and still make a profit. And corn stays cheap as long as the only thing there is to do with it is make bread, and the only people who want to buy it are bakers.
But when people want to use corn for something else, like say, biofuel, and the biofuel man comes along and he wants all the corn, then he offers the farmer more money for it. Then when the baker needs corn for the bread, he’s got to pay at least as much as the biofuel guy. As the demand goes up, so does the cost. And the baker has to turn around and raise the price of his bread which means you and I have to pay more every time we have a hankerin’ for a PB & J sandwich.
For some reason, though, gas doesn’t work this way. I buy an SUV with double the gas tank size and half the mileage as my old car and the cost of the gas should stay the same, but it doesn’t; it goes up. Why? Because of Bush. A coupla million Chinese people decide they don’t want to bike to work anymore, go out and buy a car, and say “fill’er up!”once a week, and the cost of gas should stay the same, but it doesn’t; it goes up. Why? Because of Bush. People who love trees and flowers and owls don’t want to have to look at those things with an oil refinery in the background don’t let an oil refinery be built for a generation, and the cost of gas should stay the same, but it doesn’t; it goes up. Why? Because of Bush. See? That’s how gas is. It’s not like corn or a loaf of bread. The price of corn goes up with greater demand. Gas doesn’t. The price of gas only goes up because of Bush.
And with corn there is…….heyyyyyy……...wait a second!…….Wait just a gall-dang minute here! Corn is sold by the bushel. The BUSHel!!!
That dirty creep! Enough is enough! NOW I see why my grocery bill has been going up! It’s one thing if he wants me to pay him four bucks a gallon for gas, but I’ll be DAMNED if I’m going to pay him one red cent more for my PB&J sandwich!!!
Monday, April 14, 2008
Sign of the Times
There is a Catholic school in the area where I live that has a large sign posted on the lawn in front. The sign proclaims:
"This school saved taxpayers Z thousands of dollars last year." (I'm using Z because I don't remember the exact figure.
Of course, being of curious mind, I wanted to find out how this was done. So I gave the school a call and inquired.
"Well, it costs the county Y dollars a year per student. We have X number of students who would have to attend county schools if it weren't for us, so it would cost the county Z thousands more dollars." I thanked the person for the info, and hung up.
I would never send my child to this school, because the people running it have terrible math skills.
Oh, they had the problem correct. The way they figure it, X times Y equals Z. It certainly works out that way.
The problem is that the equation is wrong.
That's because Y (the cost per pupil expenditure) of the public school system is an expression of an average, not an actual dollar cost. The school doesn't get a set sum of money for each student enrolled. They get an operating budget to pay for everything the school system needs, from books, to light bulbs, to salaries for custodians, to replacing the basketball nets when the thugs tear them off and wear them as a fashion statement.
The cost per pupil expenditure is also not a reflection of how much it costs to educate each child. Some kids cost a lot to educate. Some cost next to nothing. We have a school in our system that educates kids that are profoundly disabled, either physically or mentally. Because of the medical and other needs of these students, they can cost the system up to fifty thousand dollars a year to "educate". And if we have a kid in our county whose needs are beyond what the system can provide, we have to pay for him to go to a school that can provide for him, even if that school is in another state. I wonder if this Catholic school would accept any of these children into their care for the same cost they are charging the other students?
On the other hand, when the school I teach at had a kid transfer in from out of state last week, it didn't cost them any more money just because they had one more student. They didn't have to go out and buy extra books, hire a new teacher, or have a new locker installed just for this student, nor did the kid soak up more of the heat or light, causing the electric bill to jump up.
The kids enrolled in this private school come from all over the county, from all different communities. They have less than one hundred kids enrolled. If you closed their school and sent all the kids back to the public school in their home communities, it would amount to about four or five additional students for each county school, and the monetary impact would be negligible.
In short, the amount of money that this private school is saving the county taxpayers wouldn't buy these less than one hundred kids a pack of pencils.
And I thought it was just the PUBLIC schools that were poor at math?
"This school saved taxpayers Z thousands of dollars last year." (I'm using Z because I don't remember the exact figure.
Of course, being of curious mind, I wanted to find out how this was done. So I gave the school a call and inquired.
"Well, it costs the county Y dollars a year per student. We have X number of students who would have to attend county schools if it weren't for us, so it would cost the county Z thousands more dollars." I thanked the person for the info, and hung up.
I would never send my child to this school, because the people running it have terrible math skills.
Oh, they had the problem correct. The way they figure it, X times Y equals Z. It certainly works out that way.
The problem is that the equation is wrong.
That's because Y (the cost per pupil expenditure) of the public school system is an expression of an average, not an actual dollar cost. The school doesn't get a set sum of money for each student enrolled. They get an operating budget to pay for everything the school system needs, from books, to light bulbs, to salaries for custodians, to replacing the basketball nets when the thugs tear them off and wear them as a fashion statement.
The cost per pupil expenditure is also not a reflection of how much it costs to educate each child. Some kids cost a lot to educate. Some cost next to nothing. We have a school in our system that educates kids that are profoundly disabled, either physically or mentally. Because of the medical and other needs of these students, they can cost the system up to fifty thousand dollars a year to "educate". And if we have a kid in our county whose needs are beyond what the system can provide, we have to pay for him to go to a school that can provide for him, even if that school is in another state. I wonder if this Catholic school would accept any of these children into their care for the same cost they are charging the other students?
On the other hand, when the school I teach at had a kid transfer in from out of state last week, it didn't cost them any more money just because they had one more student. They didn't have to go out and buy extra books, hire a new teacher, or have a new locker installed just for this student, nor did the kid soak up more of the heat or light, causing the electric bill to jump up.
The kids enrolled in this private school come from all over the county, from all different communities. They have less than one hundred kids enrolled. If you closed their school and sent all the kids back to the public school in their home communities, it would amount to about four or five additional students for each county school, and the monetary impact would be negligible.
In short, the amount of money that this private school is saving the county taxpayers wouldn't buy these less than one hundred kids a pack of pencils.
And I thought it was just the PUBLIC schools that were poor at math?
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